Foster Parent Association Meeting

Oh. my.  That's the best way to sum up this meeting.

I wanted to go to the meeting for several reasons:  I wanted to connect with other foster parents in the area.  I wanted to get continuing education hours (I was told when there are speakers at the meetings, you get credit for hours), and/or to find out where I could get hours.  I wanted to get any "inside" information to the workings of my county's foster care system. 

When I walked in and introduced myself by my first name, another girl asked me my last name.  She said, "Oh, you're the one who lives in my neighborhood!"  The licensing worker had told me there was another foster parent in my neighborhood, but couldn't give me her number because she hadn't gotten permission.  I had given her permission to pass my information on, but no one ever contacted me.  Turns out this other foster mom is also single, started her licensing process about the same time I did (but received her license about three months before I did), and lives about a ten-minute walk away.  We exchanged phone numbers and said we would try to meet up sometime this week. 

And then it all went downhill from there.

The meeting started about 15 minutes late, by Mr. GoodOlBoy President.  I gather that there were elections at the last meeting for secretary and vice president (but not for president and treasurer?  I'm still not exactly clear on this), and GoodOlBoy was saying that he would like to conduct business by the executive committee (i.e. officers) meeting and deciding things, and then conveying them to the association.  That didn't sit well with many of the members who said that any business of the Association should be discussed with all of the members.  He said for example, where and when to have the Christmas party just had to be decided by the officers because you will never please everyone.  (I agree; but feel that people still want to have input, even if that is not what is ultimately decided.)  I think people started saying that they would like to investigate some other possibilities for Christmas party venue for this year.  And the two DSS workers that were present (that are not "association" members) suggested to have it in the next town over (about 15 minutes away) to possibly draw interest from foster parents in the other end of the county (We live in a rural county that is spread out over about 1200 square miles.)  GoodOlBoy explained that he had connections and had already talked to them about helping out with the party; he couldn't just go back on them; and that if he weren't involved anymore, many of them would not help the Association anymore because "they trust GoodOlBoy President" (often referring to himself in the third person and by first and last names).  This went on for AN. HOUR.  I was never sure exactly what was trying to be accomplished or what was going on, but he kept saying things like, "You listen at GoodOlBoy President" and "I know what I'm talking about."  He said that if things got moved to a different location, "things would get corrupt."  (I have NO CLUE what he meant by that!)  Even though it was strange, and there was no direction, never did anyone raise their voice or walk out of the room or shake their finger at anyone. 

So after an hour of this, someone said to table this until the next meeting so that we could have our DSS workers do their talk for our continuing education credit.  After they were done, GoodOlBoy asked the DSS workers to leave.  He said he would never again conduct Foster Parent Association business with non-members (i.e. DSS workers) present, that they had no business saying things about trying to move the Christmas party venue, etc.  He said that "never in my 20 years of doing this have I had a meeting get out of hand like this one"; when someone asked how specifically he thought it got out of hand, he said that everyone was making random decisions about the party and stuff.  He said that "I'm going to have to do a lot of praying about this" and "I honestly pray you guys vote me out" (he has been part of the Association for 20 years, and I'm gathering president for a really really really long time). 

I kind of hope he gets voted out, too.  This is the first meeting I've been to, but it seems like this county's Foster Parent Association needs some change.

Again, Oh. my.

At least I got SOMETHING out of the meeting - I got connected with another single foster mom that lives in my neighborhood.