Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Two More Months

I originally was under the impression that Evie would be with me at least eight weeks after the last minute screw-up.  I found out this week that it will be at least three months from that point, so court will not be held until sometime in May at the very earliest.  And I'm not sure what normally happens for first-time screw-ups like this, but I know that if I were the judge, I would say that the mom had to prove herself for more than those three months before she could get her kids back.

There has also been some discussion about Evie possibly moving to be with her brother in his foster home.  We could do this at any time (I even discussed with the caseworker and she felt like Evie's joy over being with her brother would more than make up for any negatives surrounding the move), but I have decided it would not be good for her to move in the middle of the school year, since she would have to change schools and she LOVES her school and teacher so much. 

So if the kids are still in care when school gets out, I think we will look at getting them back together in one home.  It can't be mine since I only have one bed (my second slot is for a crib infant).  And if they are still in care in June, that will probably mean that court was already held and the judge decided NOT to send them home at that time.  Plus, if the case ends up going to adoption, OFM (Other Foster Mom) said she would adopt both of them, so it would be best for Evie to be in that home before rights are terminated.  *Side note: For a long time, I said I was certain that Evie would go back to her mom; it was just a matter of when.  Now... I'm just not so sure.  It wouldn't surprise me if the case ended in termination.  Or if they were reunited and then returned to care at some point.  I hope that's not true for the kids' sake, but only time will tell. 

Monday, February 9, 2015

Music Monday: The Wood Song

The Wood Song by Indigo Girls

This is a song by my favorite band.  It is from the album Swamp Ophelia, which was released in 1994, at just about the height of my Indigo Girls fandom.  I don't think I realized it at the time (I was just starting college), but at some point I figured out that this was my lifesong.  It still is.  EVERY TIME I hear this song, I feel more at peace.  I LOVE this song.  It's always kind of been my encouragement that at some point I will get to the other side and the "prize" (husband? kids? something else that I can't even imagine at this point?) will make the whole journey worth it.  Encouragement that if one is living life fully, there will be heartbreak and sadness.... but that at the end it will be clear how everything fits in to the "tricky plan."  Maybe at some point this won't be my lifesong anymore.  Or maybe even if I get to "the other side", I will only love the song even more because it will make me appreciate where I came from.  The prize is always worth the rocky ride...

The thin horizon of a plan is almost clear
My friends and I have had a tough time
Bruising our brains hard up against change
All the old dogs and the magician

Now I see we're in the boat in two-by-two's
Only the heart that we have for a tool we could use
And the very close quarters are hard to get used to
Love weighs the hull down with its weight

But the wood is tired, and the wood is old
And we'll make it fine, if the weather holds
But if the weather holds, we'll have missed the point
That's where I need to go

No way construction of this tricky plan
Was built by other than a greater hand
With a love that passes all our understanding
Watching closely over the journey

Yeah, but what it takes to cross the great divide
Seems more than all the courage I can muster up inside
But we get to have some answers when we reach the other side
The prize is always worth the rocky ride

But the wood is tired, and the wood is old
And we'll make it fine, if the weather holds
But if the weather holds, we'll have missed the point
That's where I need to go

Sometimes I ask to sneak a closer look
Skip to the final chapter of the book
And then maybe steer us clear from some of the pain it took
To get us where we are this far, this far

But the question drowns in its futility
Even I have got to laugh at me
No one gets to miss the storm of what will be
Just holding on for the ride

But the wood is tired, and the wood is old
And we'll make it fine, if the weather holds
But if the weather holds, we'll have missed the point
That's where I need to go

Sunday, February 8, 2015

Visit with Tank

I went to Tank's aunt's house today to visit with him and take a bag of his things that I still had.  She lives about a 45-minute drive from me, so I left Evie with a friend.  He was just waking up from a nap when I got there, and his aunt picked him up from his crib and tried to hand him to me directly.  But he kept turning away for her to hold him.  He WAS looking at me, though, when I was talking, with a look that said, "I think I might know that voice..."  After we got down on the floor and started playing, he warmed up quickly and snuggled and played with me. 

Baby Boy is standing by himself now!  A couple of times he pulled up on my leg while I was sitting on the floor, and then let go and stood about five or more seconds.  And he has gotten two new teeth on the top.

His aunt was very sweet, and thanked me for taking care of him when he needed me... which made me tear up a little.  She is married with an 18- and 14-year old.  She said that she is thinking about becoming a regular foster parent (to teenagers!) once he goes back to his mom (which she says looks like it will be around his first birthday in April). 

When he left my house, I wrote a letter to him and sent it with his stuff.  I also included some pictures for his mom.  Aunt said that she gave the mom the pictures, but that she kept the letter I had written to him, and that she would keep up with it (because she didn't think mom would) and would give it to him when he got older. 

I miss that little guy like crazy, but it makes my heart smile that he is being loved on and well cared-for!

Valentine's Day Hairdo

I'm really proud of this one!  Rockin' out another 'do from Chocolate Hair, Vanilla Care!

Saturday, February 7, 2015

Tax Woes

Well, it has happened to me. 

I filed my taxes yesterday and crossed my fingers that Evie's mom had not claimed her first.  (Since she has been with me more than six months of the year, I am the one who can claim her on my taxes.)

And then I got a message today from my tax preparer that the return had been kicked back because someone had already claimed Evie.  Great.

I should have known because on January 29, Evie's mom FINALLY got a cell phone of her own (she has been using her mom's for the last three months); and a few days later she told Evie she had bought her a Frozen bed set she had been asking for, as well as a Frozen bookbag.  Now she's going to have to pay the money back to the IRS... and I'm sure every penny of it is already spent. 

Now I begin the process of gathering documentation to prove that I am actually the one eligible to claim her.  Ugghhh.